Friday, April 8, 2016

Blowing off steam

* I get awfully frustrated with people who are not gay and in the Church. When I try and talk with them about some of the things that have happened recently in the Church regarding the LGBT community (policy change last November excluding children of gay people from joining the Church until they are 18, President Nelson calling this policy "revelation", Elder Bednar saying that "there are no gay people in the Church", having just had General Conference and feeling erased from the Church as there was NO mention of LGBT people, etc.), I am told, "It doesn't affect me, so I don't care" or "A lot of hard things are going to happen in the last days. You'll have to decide where you stand and stay strong with the Church."

Oh, how easy it is for them to say these things.

And, oh, how difficult it is for me to hear them say these things so passively dismissively.

None of these are of any consequence for them.

There is no urgency.

None.

Why, oh, why, cannot people have empathy for the plight of a gay Mormon?

Why is it so difficult, even for a moment, for them to step in our shoes and walk even a block?

Their narrow-minded way of life keeps them so unaffectedly insulated from things through which we go.

It is enough to make me crazy.

* Here are two myths about LGBT people I personally have encountered:

 1) When I shared with the gal who cuts my hair that I am gay, she said, "Oh, that's OK- as long as you don't make a pass at me."  People believe because someone is gay, she is and will be attracted to every other woman on the planet. This is so completely false, just as the fact that every heterosexual woman is NOT attracted to every man on the planet.

2) People believe that if someone is gay, she must be living the "gay lifestyle" which, translated, means a lifestyle of promiscuity, binge sex, one-night stands, alcohol, and who knows what else.

This was one of the things that frightened me most when I finally acknowledged to myself that I was gay- I thought, wrongly, that because I was gay, I would HAVE to live this so-called "lifestyle".  And, I did not want to.

That terrible perception was what I had been taught by society and by the Church.

This myth almost cost me my life.